Posted by: brenbrennan | February 10, 2012

Moving In Together

"I'm not coming on too strong, am I?"

You want to take the excitement out of your romantic relationship? Want to squash the incredible anticipation of your wedding day and honeymoon night? Well, all you need to do is… move in with your boyfriend!

I am 45 years old and have traditional family values. I’m what you call an “old-school” American mom. I am shocked by the ease with which young ladies mention they are “living with” their boyfriend.

I Planned for Success
My parents married in the 1950’s and call me crazy, but I wanted the entire package of lifelong marriage, a meaningful wedding, and an intact family that most little girls dream of. I was willing to do WHATEVER it took to find the right man for me and to keep my marriage together. I have always had a determined spirit. Even as a young girl of 8 or 9, I decided that upon my death bed, if I had accomplished NOTHING ELSE in my lifetime, I wanted to say that I stayed married to the same man and had a happy marriage.

Mom and Daddy’s Marriage
My parents had one of the best marriages I’ve ever seen and they were truly in love with each other. Although, my sweet Daddy passed away in 2009, my mom and dad had 53 years of marriage. In my mind, their wedding was THE BEST wedding ever. My mom was a stunning bride. My father was THE MOST HANDSOME MAN in the world and my hero. We used to talk about which famous people had true character. He introduced my to Emily Dickinson’s poetry. He taught me about Martin Luther King and Mahatma Ghandi.

Do You Really Want to Risk Your Future Marriage?
Co-habitation has an incredibly bad track record. Seventy-five percent of those who live together before marriage, end up divorced. Look around at our society. Divorce has destroyed the foundations of our country. Do you really want to be one more statistic to add to the innumerable broken homes and hearts?

Delayed Gratification. What’s That?

OK, so why not DO something about it? Give your future marriage the best possible opportunity to be successful. Basically, it takes self-control and delayed gratification. I hate to say that not many people are willing to do that. Most people just throw in the towel and jump into a casually-connected set up hoping it will work.

How do you expect a man to respect you if you don’t care enough about yourself to have a man treat you like a lady. If I want to be treated like a lady, that means I need to ACT like a lady, not a tramp. When you move in with a man without being married to him, in essence, this is what you are saying to him, “Oh, you don’t have a kitchen? That’s all right. I don’t need to eat.” There will come a point where you WILL want to eat.



  1. Great Blog Gay! Wish everyone would read it!!


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